As strange as it may seem, I am quite the conservationist so investing time and money in the Enigin scam initiative seemed like the right thing to do. You are probably wondering what on earth I am talking about. This is understandable and as I know I can ramble on regardless of place and setting, I beg your indulgence. All will be revealed and for the energy saver lovers amongst you allow me to assure you that this is something you will be most interested in.
Generally speaking, I am one of those people who would moan for ages should there be something they really want to do that is not happening and I am absolutely lost in the current employment environment. I am looking for the job I would really love to do - and this is just what people always tell me- look for something you would really love to do. Well, I have found that ’something'long time back but somehow I do not see it happening for me for some reason. So what should be the general conclusion - it is not worth following your aspirations but answering to your necessities - you need a job to earn money and, as it happens nowadays, this might be the worst job you have ever wanted to do.
Now, I’m aware that I might be alone in bemoaning the current British climate but blimey! Whilst I’m obviously not against a good sunny day in July, in the month when I was expecting to be wearing jumpers and getting my winter coat to the dry cleaners, an average of 28 degrees in October is a bit of a shock. Sure, I’ll be saving on heating oil and I’ll be finally getting some use out of that BBQ, but… I’m a big a fan of autumn.
I bloody love crisp, cool days when the leaves are turning and you can walk through the park scrunching them beneath your feet. I really, really do. Yeah, the summer is great for swimming, and hanging out in pub gardens, and wearing shorts and that stuff… But when do we really get to do that in the UK? About once in June, and then once again in July.
Autumn and Spring are when we get the weather we’re used to. When everyone starts talking about it getting a bit parky or feeling that nip in the air whilst bundled up with scarves and gloves. I’m willing to take a bet that we have more scarves and gloves and wooly hats than all the countries that really need them, like Finland or Iceland or Norway, put together. I know I probably do, just by myself.
It’s a rite of passage, like shopping for back to school, getting a new hat and scarf and gloves for the winter. Only luckily once you’re a grown-up its less painful as you can ignore all the pencil cases and novelty erasers and just concentrate on things that you’ll actually like.
Actually, that’s one of the best advantages of being grown-up- never having to think about novelty erasers again.
Even better, enlist a helpful mum/gran/auntie or knit-geek friend to make gloves and hats and scarves to your own specification, in whatever fancy wool you choose. If they’re unwilling, just try and look a bit cold and peaky, and remind them… it’s Christmas soon…
I don’t know, life is hard, isn’t it? Take my life for example (and we would have to, seeing as my life is infinitely more intriguing on every level than yours). As a child I was brought up to believe that I was worth something. That I was great. That I was better than anyone. My parents said it all the time and told me to have confidence in my own abilities, so I was only doing as they asked.
Then, when I arrived at Secondary School came a massive bombshell which threatened my narcissistic personality to its core: suddenly people were telling me that I was a good person, but that, horror of horrors, we were all EQUAL. I detested this. I mean, of course I saw that white people and black people were equal, but as far as anything else there was no question that I was superior. The problem was, whenever I started telling the world about this – including the teachers – people tended to get very angry. Soon after I started telling the world about all this – I was giving a speech at lunch time – I was hauled into the Headmaster’s office. He asked me what I thought I was doing and so I told him: “I am just in the process of telling everyone how superior I am, what’s the problem with that?”
He stared at me. I stared at him. This staring malarkey went on for some time. Finally he looked out his window and pointed. “See that Red Diesel Leicester lorry?” he said.
nobody is me, are they?
I said I did and couldn’t miss it, for it was enormous. “What’s it doing here?” I said.
“I don’t know, it must have taken a wrong turn,” he told me, “but that’s beside the point.”
“What is the point?”
He leaned over the table and got serious. “Do you think the driver in there thinks he is better than every other driver in the world?”
“I don’t know, shall we go and ask him?”
“No!”
“Then we will never know.”
“Indeed.” He rubbed his face with his hands. “The point is that he probably doesn’t. He probably doesn’t even think about it. The point is, really, that we are all equal.”
This prompted me to tell him he was wrong, which he did not like.
And repeat. This was how I grew up.
It’s not always easy being me, you know. But then again you probably wouldn’t, because nobody is me, are they?
See the video below for some funny things that some — not as good children as I was — say.
As I know you all so very interested in every tiny little detail of my life, I will tell you about my recent trip into my local accident and emergency ward.
It was a normal day, and I was out taking care of my lovely yard, watering the pot plants and polishing the marble table. My Vietnamese maid had taken the week off you see, I had to do it all myself. I climbed up onto the ladder to water More
Recently I found myself in one of the most exclusive clubs in London (no names mentioned). I had been out for a after work drinks with a friend in central London when we had both probably had one too many. My friend came up with the bright idea of heading out to Chelsea to life the high life with like the Made in Chelsea stars and pretend that we could actually afford the life that they live. We promised ourselves More
I have noticed that not everything that I have wished to do in the UK I actually did and this is how I started thinking about going abroad and looking for a better place to make a career and for a better way of earning money protected from the tax problems that many of us are struggling with in the land of the Queen.
My first look was at Switzerland - definitely the country that I would be most likely More
I think a lot of myself and my abilities so I figured I did not need apple mac repair London because I could fix my apple Mac’s problem myself. For days I was up trying to fix this thing until way into the night and depriving myself well needed sleep. My friend warned me against sleep deprivation because he thought was not healthy. I did not believe him so I checked it out myself.
I sometimes feel compelled to admit that a lot of my existence is, to be honest, a little bit pointless. That looked at from a certain point of view, I’m a bit of a drain on the world’s resources. By that I don’t just mean my parents, or the many other people who’ve lent me money or resources or time over the years I’ve been pursuing my quasi-intellectual existence. It sometimes seems like there are a whole series of economic More
As the country prepares for another rise in tuition fees, which will amount to £9,000 a year at the majority of Britain’s higher education institutions, it has been suggested that around 80 percent of female graduates won’t have to pay back their student loans because they would be earning less than the £21,000 threshold, at which people begin repaying the loans.
This may be encouraging news for the Coalition, which has witnessed fierce protests from hundreds of thousands of students More
